VP Debate and my Life

The VP debate was two nights ago (I think...), so I just wanted to record my thoughts for posterity's sake. I'm really not all that concerned with the politics of the debate...because its just two people who don't really have any decision making capabilities talking about issues that have already been talked about - and their views on those issues dont even matter because that's not the VPs job.

Palin is so dumb that I actually feel bad. Aside from the fact that it seemed like she had memorized lines that she tried to fit in wherever she could, she dodged a lot of questions...and when she DID answer questions, her opinions sucked. And so did her comeback. Palin, "don't cha know" isn't a come back...especially not in your goofy accent.

A note to both candidates: I can see why you wouldn't support gay marraige. I know that there are a lot of personal reasons that you wouldn't support it. But your reasons are just that - PERSONAL. Your personal reasons should not dictate my personal life. I'm not saying that you should support gay marraige, but I am saying that you shouldn't oppose it. We're told to seperate church and state; what more are your personal views then just a form of your religious ones? When a matter is between you and God or you and your conscience, it should be seperate from public law. An ammendment to define marraige as between one man and one woman is just not OK - it's unconstitutional on so many levels that I won't even get into it. If we want to play with the Constitution, though, we should recognize that it leaves issues such as gay marraige up to the states.

Ok. That's the end of my rant.

I miss camp a lot. That's all.

Obviously, I'm not going to delete it, but I regret my last post. I was pretty shallow. That feeling lasted until I posted the blog and got it out of my system. I'm back to being head-over-heals for VGBF. He's coming to visit me in a few months. I'm very happy.

He and I talked again yesterday and today, and it was just nice and nonthreatening conversation. We just talked. It was awesome.

On to school:
I hate it. I want to leave.
My ideal situation would be to go to medical school in the UK, which means finishing this application, taking the UKCAT (which costs $170 and is a 2 hour drive from me), finding someone to write me a letter of recommendation, and then GETTING IN.
More likely situations include going to community college for resp. therapy or paramedicine OR staying in this shit hole.

WTF. Seriously?

Ok. So I hate college. I hate the people, and the place. I want to leave. But where do I go? I want to go to school in England, but I'm apparantly underqualified (which I think is a misunderstanding of the American educational system) and I don't have the money but I NEED to get out of here. Thegoddamn test that I'd need to take to even apply is like $170. Kill me.

And my VGBF is being a douche. He doesn't initiate any conversation with me, and when I try to he gives one word answers. It's like talking to the fucking wall. And seriously - I don't want to make it sound like he owes me, but I paid to get his plane ticket switched, and he borrowed $250 from me before he left...and hasn't paid me back. If he bothered to maintain our friendship I wouldnt be bothered, but now I feel like he just used me.

Urrg. My life.

I came out to the two girls at school who I'm close with. Obviously, they handled it like babies and facebook stalked people to try to get information. It was so irritating.

I talked to my very good British (VGBF) friend again today for a while. Basically, I miss him so much that it hurts, so talking to him is like an escape from the pain. He's still planning on coming to visit during break, so God-willing, it will happen. Already, though, I'm thinking about how tough it's going to be to say goodbye again. (BTW he recently updated his status on facebook to mention that he missed me).

I miss camp, too. I can't even describe it. If i could drop out of school today and go back to camp, I would. I would give anything to be at camp for my entire life, preferable with my VGBF.

I really want to leave the country. I'm thinking about possibly transferring into a school in the UK, but I think I might be too late for next school year and I definitely can't afford it... I just don't want to be in my school anymore. I'm at the point where I would even consider dropping out and becoming a medic at community college and then trying to move overseas. Maybe if I study abroad next year it will get this feeling out of me...I don't think so, though. I need to get out of this place.

I also want to go to England to visit, but I don't have the money for that. Maybe if I ask for money for Christmas and my birthday, I'll be able to go over between school-ending and camp-beginning.

IDK I'm done typing I think. I'll write more when I feel like it.

So today was dumb.
I had class all morning, then one in the afternoon.
I didn't talk to like anyone who I would have liked to talk to. That's a lie.
One of my friends from camp was texting me before. I'm waiting for her to get home to go on AIM so we can talk more indepth.

One of my friends is moving to an island-nation called Vanuatu. Apparently, in Vanuatu, they have under-water mailboxes and waterproof post cards.

My very good friend from England is going to try to visit during my Christmas break - I'm SO excited!

What else?

Tomorrow I have a two-and-a-half hour class that I have NO INTEREST in being in. I need to take it, technically - I think - but I'm pissed.

I've been studying/reading/doing homework all day. I don't know what else to do. I'm that bored.

I forgot...

So, I forgot about my blog. Oops. Honest mistake.

Now, I'm at college. I'm so bored that I needed something to do. So, I'm blogging.

Camp was seriously incredible. Probably later today I'll post some specific stories, but for now I'll go for a quick overview: I love inner city kids. I love the counselors/staff at the camp. I love the camp. I love the program of the camp. I love taking care of kids. It was a perfect fit.

Camp ended for me a week-and-a-half ago so I could pack for school and leave and stuff. I loved camp - if I could do it year-round, I totally would...and I would drop out of school to do it. I had to say goodbye to everyone at camp, which was really hard. The one person who I am still totally in love with, though, had a family emergency and needed to catch a plane back to England, so he came home with me that night so I could drive him to the airport. He, being a straight male, is not into me, but we still were really close. I'm like an emotional wreck over it, still. It's hard knowing that I'm never going to see him again, also.

So this college thing sucks. There is literally nothing to do. I real blogs all day. And eat. And sleep.

CAMP IS AWESOME!
I'm soooo happy.
That's really all I have to say - I am just in bliss!